I Race Bikes.

Yoohoo! Remember me?! I can’t believe it’s been 2 weeks since I last posted, then part of me feels likes it’s been even longer. Last night I sat down to update this bad boy, when I receieved a little chirp of shared information, intel as I've often referred to it. What you are about to read was my original plan. An update on the past two weeks. Leaving out the "juice", the griddy, the intel that one receives texts about. For a hot second I was about to put #1 first, and give you the deets. It was just the icing on the cake - you know that feeling? The "aww F it moment'? It was close. But not close enough. THIS is why Hennessey Hits should just be HITS. Anonymous writing. I need it. It'd be so much more entertaining! Until then...

I race bikes. And just as you would imagine, I never win! The sad part is I’m referring to the ever so popular iPhone app – BikeRaceTFG. To say I’m behind is an understatement. Some of my friends literally have thousands of wins thus far, and homegirl is ecstatic nearing 20. I don’t normally join in on these escapades knowing I’ll be terrible, but after one too many glasses of wine the other night, and a motivational speech from a girl friend, I downloaded that free app faster than you can say, “You suck”. To my surprise there were many friends waiting to play and have since challenged me day after day. I accept your challenge, so thank you. If nothing else, I can tell I’m improving. Does that count? Like the fictional head coach Danny O’Shea from the great children's sports comedy, Little Giants, says, ‘even if they beat us 99 times out of 100, that still leaves….1 time’. It sounds better when Junior, aka Devon Sawa repeats it, but whatever (and yes, once upon a time I wanted to be Becky “The Ice Box” O’Shea). I’m proud of my wins, as sparse as they may be right now.

Week 1 of Pitch Slapped kickball was a success. We are undefeated, 1-0, with a double header this Friday. Just as expected things got out of hand last week. A few members of the team turned meat head. A good number didn’t make it home. And everyone enjoyed the sweet taste of victory. Round 2 hits in just days.

 

Wedding Season 2k13 is in full blast. I celebrated Sally and Blake last weekend, and Micah and Beth are just around the corner. Follow it up with Becca and Branford, Jessica and Jonathan, and then it’s a quick breather at the end of June. Hotel rooms booked and eyes peeled for good lookin’ gents with party swag for plenty of +1’s.

Moving on…literally. The big move is this weekend. Thanks to a group of wonderful boys, with muscular arms, it should go pretty quickly. “Candy sticks” and beer to be provided. I’ve done a little at a time but good Lord, where do all these belongings come from?! I didn’t even know I owned some of this stuff. I donated a television to the Julie Valentine Center and sold a dining room table on Craigslist just so I didn’t have to move it. And to think….I’m doing this alllll again in 1.5-2 years when Mills returns from Saudi Arabia.

Closing thoughts – if moving doesn’t kill me, Dora, my explorer, will. I have literally found myself talking to her the past few days. Words of encouragement – “You can do it! Please!” - She went under this morning. Which means….it’s about that time. Time to start browsing for a new ride. First requirement: Bun warmers.

Till next time. Bike On.

The Comfort Zone

Well, we did it. We finished in last place. Right where we belonged and what we really fought hard for all season long. Being in 6^th place (of 12 teams) at the beginning was just terrible, and Team “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Gutter”, finally landed it’s 3^rd annual hot spot of “Dead Ass Last”. Look at these faces. Never been happier; I guess you could say last place is our real comfort zone. Hannah and I decided to continue our love of the shared blue ball in our team photo. We considered it “good luck” to use the same ball each week. Luck. Hmm….well, maybe not. But we did kill some turkeys this year, so vast improvements were made. We even decided as a team to throw ourselves a pizza party this week at the bowling party-celebration-extravaganza. I know…we are out of control! Getting cray cray at Star Lanes.

A big congrats to Cory Christophillis, Gram Praytor, Amit Dullah, and Hunter Reid for taking home the $$ pot and 1^st place of the Scallywag Bowling League 2013 season. AND I’ll pat myself on the back because they asked for a Hennessey Hits shout out. Here you go boys – a big raise the roof for Team “4 Guys, 1 Cup”. How they found out about my little self project here is beyond me. I’ve really reached the top!

When one season ends, another begins. My co-ed kickball league starts up this Friday and all of us on Team Pitch Slapped are ready to do what we do best…pre-game. Trust me. We had a practice this past Sunday when the glorious weather came to town. Not so glorious - the talent. Don’t get me wrong, we are one attractive group of people, but the talent literally on the field could use some help (we’ll get there, maybe). I’m referring to myself mainly, but you others, you know who you are. Practice highlights - - showing up to play and realizing none of us brought a ball, Melissa calling a pop fly as hers, then just getting smacked with a direct hit to the face instead of making the catch (I’m still laughing), Jill sitting down in the field – nothing new, and the multiple “candy sticks”, otherwise known as cigarettes, consumed for “energy puffs”. The season looks promising. With more successful relationships from past seasons than ABC’s the Bachelor, you never know what could go down during a kickball season. It’s about to get interesting. Bring on the Hot-N-Ready’s, Jell-O Shots, and large opaque thermoses. Where alcohol may not be ‘allowed’ on the fields - hydration is key, and we’re ready. #boom